Single and Searching


I’m often asked why I’m still single and I never really have a good answer. 

Maybe I didn’t try hard enough during my years at a Christian college to snag a mate. Maybe I gave up on singles groups at church too easily. Maybe it’s because I’ve never gotten on board with online dating. Or maybe there just aren't enough single men for all the single women out there.

All I know is that I just haven’t met a man I could imagine spending my life with.

I know it wasn’t the man I came close to marrying just after college. Not the divorced youth pastor. Not the widower with two young children. 

Not the man I met at work who didn’t want to come to church, but on our third date invited me to see him performing a nude scene in a local play. 

Not the man friends fixed me up with who asked me on our first meeting if I’d be content to just hang around the house with him or did we actually have to go out on a date. 

Some of the men I’ve dated were Christians and some weren’t, but honestly I didn’t always see much of a difference between them.




I'm writing over at my friend Alecia Simersky's blog today for her series Calling All Men. Will you click here or click the image below to read the rest of my thoughts on the single life?






I'm having coffee with my friends at Holley Gerth's place at Coffee for your Heart. If you click the image, there are more posts to read from my blogger friends!



Comments

  1. I commented over on Alecia's blog where your lovely post was featured today but just noticed our links on Holley's blog ended up one on top of the other. haha! ♥

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    1. Yes I see that at Holley's! LOL Thank you so much for showering me with sweet words over at Alecia's! xo

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  2. Love how thoughtful and personal this is! Thank you for writing. LOVE the figurines! Followed this over to Alecia's blog to read the whole thing. I love reading your guest posts!

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    1. Brittany,
      Some of my dating adventures are quite comical and some certainly belong in the misadventure category! Glad you like my vintage chalk dancing figurines and thanks for the support at Alecia's too!

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  3. I had to also comment over here to tell ya thanks for stopping by my blog again. Your kind and encouraging words are always uplifting : )

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    1. Kristina,
      I love it that you stopped by both places! :)

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  4. Just read the post and I must say I like your vulnerability. I think the decision to get married is a person one that we all have to make, at one point or the other. But, it must not be out of desperation. It must be with the right partner. You definitely want to avoid a situation where marriage sabotages your faith and purpose. I wish I knew more about marriage and purpose before I got married. But, it's not too late for me. I rely on the wisdom of God.

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    1. Hi Jane,
      Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts here. Relying on God's wisdom is a good place to be!

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  5. Valerie,
    Read your whole post.
    The figureines made me smile. My mom used to have those set out. Always thought they were beautiful.
    I like you. I like that you didn't "need" or rush to get a man.
    I'll be the first to tell you that marriage doesn't satisfy.
    In fact I think the rush to run into marriage early sets up for deep disappointment.
    I'm so glad you haven't settled.
    My sister is the same.
    I admire her strength
    I admire yours.
    Love you

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    1. Hi Somer,
      You are so gifted with your words that tell a story, that encourage others and cause me to think more deeply. I love to read what you're thinking over on your blog and I can't tell you how thankful I am to have connected with you! I often think that my life is quite lovely just as it is, and if my desires lead me a little closer to God's heart, then they are good. Thank you so much for reading my words and much love to you too! xoxo

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  6. Honest and vulnerable. Proud of you for opening up and sharing!

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    1. Yes, stepping off the edge but my friend Alecia asked me to, so I took the leap! :) Always glad to see you here! :)

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  7. You shared your personal life moments with honesty. God is an ultimate match maker. He knows that what is perfect match for you. So keep patience!

    ~Dr. Diana

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    1. Hi Diana,
      Thank you so much for visiting here, reading and sharing a comment! So much appreciated!

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